Heathens Highway

Sometimes I make porn and stuff. Sometimes I just ramble.

Category Archives for: Thinking Out Loud

Raped by a big brown dog

04 May 2006 by dwb

Do you ever have those days where you feel like you are face down in the sand, covered in cream, getting ass raped by a large brown dog wearing a funny hat, while all your friends are laughing and cheering on the dog?

I feel like that today.

Well, minus the funny hat part.

I slept like shit due to some bad food I ate late last night that kept me on the shitter puking out of both ends. Erg. I need to work today but my asshole is singing a different song. I’m sure this is all just Karma for the gay movie I shot last week.

Hell is… getting raped by a big brown dog while your friends rejoice.

Leave a comment | Categories: Hell Is:, Japan, Preposterousness, Random Photos, Thinking Out Loud, What The Fuck | Tags: , ,

Selling Pussy For Dummies

02 May 2006 by dwb

So I’m banging this whore today on Soi 6 and she got pissed off at me because I did not wait for her to cum.

I told her that I PAY FOR SEX so I don’t have to pleasure the girl unless I want to out of the kindness of my heart. When I pay for sex, it’s all about ME.

Then I explained to her that if she wants ME to get HER off, that it was going to cost her the exact same amount I just paid her to get me off. She did not find that amusing and our time together ended on a sour note.

Tomorrow I will be taking her a complementary copy of the best selling book Selling Pussy For Dummies. Sure to be a best seller in Thailand. Maybe then she will understand her job duties and limits of her chosen profession.

But then again, I may be assuming too much by thinking she can read.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Preposterousness, Random Photos, Sex, Thailand, Thinking Out Loud, Whores | Tags: , , , ,

Off the rails in Phnom Penh

27 April 2006 by dwb

I went to Phnom Penh, Cambodia for a few days of total debauchery and danger.

We went to the shooting range where we shot AK-47s, Tommy Guns, M16s, threw some hand grenades and even shot at a cow with some sort of rocket launcher.

$30 per 100 bullets. $30 per grenade. $200 for the rocket. $300 for the cow. Free steak dinner after the shoot… priceless. ;-)

That night we went out in search for some young tail that was around 18 – 19 years old. We ended up in some dark and filthy slum where we were offered 8 – 11 year old girls by some shady dude who looked like he wanted to cut our throats. We kindly declined and moved onto girls who actually had pussy hair and tits.

Once we found older girls, it was the typical wham bam, thank you mam, hope you don’t get pregnant, catch ya later routine. All for the low price of $20.

You can get $4 “taxi girls” on the side of the road sitting in shacks. These are mostly for locals, who only pay $3, but if you find one that does run from you when you pull up… it’s a cheap pump and dump if one were so inclined.

This photo is one of the places we were taken to where they paraded little girls out for us. It was literally in the middle of a horrible slum somewhere in the city. We had to walk for about 10 minutes or so through the slum, just to get to this little place. Through tiny walkways where sewers were spewing into it. In-between a few buildings where we literally had to walk through sideways so we would fit. It was crazy and scary. Stupid really. Then after all of that, they took us to a child prostitution shack. As a tip, don’t ask for “small ladies” in Cambodia unless you’re looking for kids, as we found out the hard way that is what it means.

What may have been a little more unnerving than walking to the place was walking out of it. After we declined their little girls, I had this feeling in my stomach that maybe we had seen something we shouldn’t have and because we didn’t partake, it may cause problems for us. But it didn’t and they took us out of there and onward. Creepy. Very creepy. And sad.

What I did find odd about the child prostitutes was, they were Vietnamese and not Cambodian. I assume they were kidnapped or bought from poor Vietnamese families. I’m not sure if they do this to their own girls or not, but this f-shack was 100% Vietnamese. Or so they said. I can only hope they shut all of these places down.

OK, that was a downer. Lets change the topic.

The next night I spent some time in search of shrooms but was sadly defeated. I wanted to eat some and run around the city until I got mugged. Probably would not have had to go far, a lot of the city is pretty shady once the sun goes down. Any place that will sell you a little girl and let you shoot rockets at cows, will not think twice about gutting you for a dime. Maybe less.

Cambodia sticks it to you with a $25 entry AND a $25 exit fee. But I guess after you blew a few hundred bucks to shoot a rocket at a cow, $50 is no big deal.

I’m glad I missed the cow though. It’s not as easy as you’d think to shoot one of those things.

Leave a comment | Categories: Cambodia, F-Shack, Keepin It Real, On The Road, Sex, Thinking Out Loud, Whores | Tags: , , , , , ,

The Mekong Delta

26 March 2006 by dwb

We spent the day wearing rice hats (like the one you see here) and boating around the Mekong river. I actually took this photo from the back of the boat.

Many of you know of this river from the Vietnam War and war movies like Apocalypse Now.

From what we were told, the area we were in saw a lot of fighting between the US Navy and Viet Cong Guerrillas.

I sure as shit would not have wanted to fight here as you can not see anything on the banks, and the water is brown so you can not see what is 1 inche in the water. Talk about being a sitting duck. You are totally blind on all sides. Scary stuff.

There are really no words to describe just how thick the jungle is here. I am not exaggerating when I saw that like the water, you can’t see a single inch into it. This is something I’ve never given real thought to until today.

Leave a comment | Categories: On The Road, Thinking Out Loud, Vietnam | Tags: ,

Vietnam is hot as hell

25 March 2006 by dwb

Yesterday, the heat index it was 119 degrees. For normal guys like you and me, that is fucking hot.

Seriously, it’s not even funny how hot it was, but I’m going to make a few bad jokes about it anyway.

One could say that the heat burns worse than a bad case of gonorrhea.

Or that it is hotter than a set of rims and a Nelly concert.

Others may say that you could fry an egg on the sidewalk or simply that it is a scorcher.

I prefer “hot as hell.” This would be the most accurate of them all.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, On The Road, Thinking Out Loud, Vietnam | Tags: , ,

Crack hotel blues

24 February 2006 by dwb

As I mentioned before, I’m staying at a crack hotel in North Hollywood. Not that I can’t afford a better place, well maybe I can’t, but its right down the street from where I am working 18 hour days getting these new sites and affiliate program off the ground.

The Indians who run my hotel are fucking with me almost daily. The will only let me pay for two days at a time and then call me at 11am to come down to pay more on the third day, after I did not go to bed until 6 or 7am and have asked them repeatedly to not bother me until 3pm. I spoke to the manager and he said he would let me pay one week at a time now, so today that is what I attempted to do.

I told the Indian working there that I was going to stay for two more weeks now because my job was taking longer than planned. He told me with a straight face that I can not stay for two consecutive weeks and that I could only stay for one week, then I would have to check out for one full day and then come back the next day to stay the second  week.

He didn’t look like he was fucking with me, but anything is possible. It’s hard to trust a guy who is talking to you and at the same time his head is moving like a wobble doll.

I’m already aggravated with these people so I just say “OK” and try to pay for the week. Not so fast! He will only let me pay for six days and not the full week! That’s a day short for those of you with a learning disability.

Maybe he is fucking with me.

It’s too close to the office and I am too lazy to change hotels right this minute, so if I don’t murder him, I’m going to have to put up with his shit.

One thing that I have been doing, since he has been terrorizing me, is every morning when I roll in around 6 or 7am and he is still sleeping in the office, I wake him up. I make up an excuse to need him. Toilet paper, soap, towels… what ever. I just wake that asshole up every chance I get for the non-sense he is putting me through.

I wish I had my camera with me or I would show you some pics of this shit hole and the numb nut Indians running the joint.

Now that I’m thinking about it, I may kill him tonight. I’ll let you know how it works out.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, On The Road, Thinking Out Loud, What The Fuck | Tags: , ,

Hateful ex-girlfriends

04 February 2006 by dwb

These are hateful things that evil women like to say after a breakup:

1) By the way… I have herpes.
2) I’m pregnant with your child!
3) You never made be cum, I faked every orgasm.
4) My new boyfriend makes me cum harder that I ever have in my life.

And these are the ones that I could care less about:

3) You never made be cum, I faked every orgasm.
4) My new boyfriend makes me cum harder that I ever have in my life.

Because to be honest, I could care less if the whore got off or not. I got mine and that’s pretty much all that matters.

But number 2 is the funniest one in the event you have had a vasectomy and she doesn’t know about it. A friend of mine had that happen to him.

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Porn is forever

23 January 2006 by dwb

I’m really fed up with chicks who shoot a video, then when they get caught by someone they know, call me begging me to remove their videos and photos. It is getting out of hand.

In addition to all the other wack bitches who have done this, I have this black girl on my ass right now because just about everyone she knows found out she was banging a white boy on the internet.

Now… she didn’t care anything about this when she was getting top dollar for a days work. I wanted her so bad I paid her more than some of the girls in LA get. Yea, really. And I shot her two days in a row, so she took home a lot of cash.

She also didn’t care anything about being seen when she called me back the following week wanting to do it again because she needed… more money.

At no time did she care or even think about her friends at that point. All she cared about was getting paid. But once that money is gone, everything changes.

Now that she is busted, she claims her life is ruined, she is ashamed, she doesn’t want to leave the house, everyone at work knows she did it and talks about it every day… yadda, yadda, yadda, ebonics, ebonics, ebonics. I lost track of what she was saying 3/4 of the way through the conversation when she got super ghetto on me. Sorry Dalonda, I don’t speak ebonics.

The first thing I told her was she needed to nip the work shit in the ass. That is sexual harassment. Period. She needs to hire an attorney and go get their ass. I’m sure some ambulance chaser would be all over that one.

Second, I reminded her how she was loving the money she got and had fun spending it. It’s only when your broke and busted do you feel bad for what you did.No one forced you to do anything and you even signed a contract with me. You knew damn good and well what you were doing.

Of course all of that fell on deaf ears.

At this point she is willing to do “anything” she says. And she means anything to get her photos and videos pulled off the internet. That’s all fine and dandy but there is no going back once your image is on the internet. Porn is forever.

Even if I did remove her from my site, there are countless webmasters who use her photos and video samples for promotion. Not to mention how much money those two scenes are really worth. They are worth a lot more than she can afford to buy back from me, which I did give her the option to buy them back at 4x what I paid her to make them. And that was being nice.

I’m not trying to be a dick, but I’m sick of this happening. This is not the first time. They need money so they work, so they work. Then they get caught. Then I’m all of a sudden the dirt bag who is exploiting them. But lets not forget that almost every one of them sells her pussy on the side, as that is usually how I meet them. This girl was a huge ho when I met her.

Part of being an adult is learning to live with the decisions you made in the past, good or bad. Lord knows I have made plenty and would love to have a “do over” or a reset button, but that’s not going to happen. I live with what I have done.

The worst thing about all of this is, when she gets in a pickle again, she will call me wanting to work. Again. Even after all this. That is what they all do. So far, every one who has called me in tears begging for me to remove their photos and videos ALL called me at a later date wanted to shoot again.

There is a common thread among whores. They can’t save money. They spend all the money they have. They will do anything to get more. And most of them date some dead beat who smokes weed all day, plays video games and takes most of her money.

Speaking of video games, anyone see the new Grand Theft Auto? I just saw the tail end of the commercial for it last night. I love that game. It is only there I can beat the shit out of these bitches and not feel bad about it.

Leave a comment | Categories: Drama Factor, Funny Things Whores Say, Keepin It Real, Porno, Sex, Thinking Out Loud, What The Fuck, Whores | Tags: ,

My friend was a sex slave

28 December 2005 by dwb

I’ve known a Thai girl named Fon for a few years and I knew she went to Singapore to work at a hotel, but she came home early. I never knew the real story until last night.

Fon and I have been friends for a while and apparently she has not told anyone what happened and has kept it all bottled up for a long time now. She spent the night with me last night and after a few drinks, she felt comfortable enough to let it all out on me.

Fon was promised a well paying job in Singapore working at a hotel because her English skills are very good and she was willing to travel. When I heard about this I had a bad feeling about it and warned her to make sure that the people she is going to work for were good people and not in the business of trafficking women. Of course she did zero research and left for Singapore.

Upon arrival, Fon was sent to a hotel where they took all of her belongings and rushed her to the street where she was to stand with 100’s of other girls (Geylang) and wait for Johns to pick them up and take them to a cheap sex hotel.

She told them that there was a mistake and that she was not there not be a prostitute. They told her they paid a lot of money for her and that the boss spent money on her plane ticket, visa and hotel room. It was all to be paid back within the first 3 days.

In order to pay this money back, she had to fuck 80 (yes, 80) men for free and her boss would take all of the money. After that, she would then get a couple of bucks per fuck but she would then have to pay that for the room cost and for food.

Fon was trapped in a hellish cycle, forced to have sex as many as 30 times in one day with only 2 – 3 hours of sleep per night. This went on for a month until she met a customer who had a heart and wanted to help her out of the mess she was in.

The customer was able to sneak Fon to the Thai embassy where they helped her get back to Thailand.

Fon was in tears by the end of telling me all of this. She had gone into great detail about how the men would abuse her and sometimes she was forced into having sex with 4 – 5 men at a time and sometimes with boys as young as 12 years old.

She was beaten, starved, and forced to sleep in a filthy room with as many as 20 other girls. This is how she lived for a month.

I sat with her and let her cry on my shoulder for 2 hours until the sun came up.

What do you say to someone after hearing this? I chose to say nothing and just listened to her until she could not speak another word. Today I am still at a loss for words. She is sleeping on my couch as I write this. I don’t think I have ever felt so bad for someone in my life.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Sex, Singapore, Thinking Out Loud, Whores | Tags: , , , ,

Hard cocks

11 November 2005 by dwb

Why is it so difficult to find a big hard cock in this business? When your looking for new guys, 99% of them won’t even show up to meet you after you waste your time talking to them for weeks. Then, out of the guys who do show up, lets say 10 guys, maybe 2 of them can get the job done. And that is a big maybe.

I’ve never understood why guys can’t get wood on sets. I know seasoned male strippers who can get wood on command during private parties in front of a room full of ugly white trash women, but put them in front of a camera and it’s limp dick city. A crane could not life their useless cocks.

I have wasted more time dealing with wanna be porn studs than I have with anything else. I mean a true waste of time. Who would of thought that the most difficult part of making porn was finding guys with hard dicks to perform? I’ve said it once and I’ve said it a hundred times, without a solid male performer you don’t have shit. Find a good male fuck monkey and 90% of your worries are over.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Porno, Thinking Out Loud | Tags: , ,

R.I.P. Halloween

01 November 2005 by dwb

When I was a kid we had mutha fuckin’ HALLOWEEN! Not this softcore shit that they are pushing today. In my neighborhood the kids only have TWO HOURS to get the job done. ONLY TWO HOURS for Halloween!!! What is this? What can you do in 2 hours?

To add fuel to the fire, it was from 5pm to 7pm. Who the hell trick-or-treats when the sun is still up? And I live in a safe upper-scale neighborhood, I can’t imagine what’s going on in the hood.

We would head out in full costume at sundown and be heathens, stealing candy, kicking in pumpkins and burning down scarecrows until at least 11pm. Sometimes until 2am. Every year, no exceptions. Halloween did not end until one of us was injured or the police were cruising the neighborhood running everyone home. Now they get 2 lousy hours. That is just sad. They should cancel Halloween if they are going to make it so lame that it is not memorable. Kids are supposed to play hard, get dirty, run wild and scream on this night. It’s the one night of the year kids are given a pass to be… KIDS.

Today the kids are too protected. These kids will grow up to be pussies and spoiled brats. Let them get dirty. Let them get hurt and break bones. That’s part of growing up and learning how to deal with things. Let them get into trouble, it teaches them lessons. You can’t even give your kid a good old fashion ass whipping anymore without fear for legal action. Truly unreal. I will tell you here and now that if… and that’s a big IF… I ever reproduce *gulp*, I will raise my child in a country where children can still be children and not treated like china dolls. They are kids for Christ sake, let them be. Let them enjoy their youth and break a few bones along the way… it’s good for them.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Thinking Out Loud, Uncategorized | Tags: , ,

Fuck Monkeys

30 October 2005 by dwb

Male Talent aka “Fuck Monkeys”

I’m in the US now and hunting for some new guys to take to Thailand with me to bang girls and ladyboys. I have a few lined up but that is not what prompted me to post this. I need a few more.

I placed ads all over the local yahoo groups, Craig’s List and a few other sites that cater to the local sex scene. I gave very strict instructions as to what I was looking for and how to respond. One of the lines said “DO NOT REPLY WITHOUT A RECENT FULL NUDE PHOTO (not just your cock) OR WITHOUT LISTING YOUR AGE” and I go on to say how if you do the opposite of this, I will not even reply, blah, blah, blah and that there are no exceptions to this rule.

A few weeks have gone by and I have had close to 100 guys e-mail me. FOUR of them responded correctly. The other 96 either did not send photos, or sent me photos of their pathetic erect cocks and no mention of age.

Of course I did not reply to the idiots for some simple reason: If you can’t follow your FIRST simple instruction, I’m sure as hell not taking you to another country to shoot porn because you will be one of the idiots who get arrested or killed for doing something stupid. People, you are your own worst enemy. Self included.

I’m sure there are a few studs in that bunch but I’m not taking any chances. They had one simple thing they had to do, and the blew it.

Leave a comment | Categories: Porno, Thailand, Thinking Out Loud, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , ,

“Friends”

20 October 2005 by dwb

Why is it that when your in the adult industry all your distant friends think you have a little “black book” with all the porn starts names in it? They think that you can make a call and Tera Patrick will just come on over and suck them off because… well, because she’s a whore and it is expected I guess.

Then there are those “friends” who you never hear from until they want to get dirty or they just got dumped. Then all of a sudden they are up in your business wanting to come around and get in on the shoots. “Do you have any numbers of any girls?” I was asked tonight. When I told him no, he thought I was bull shitting him. Maybe I was.

These are not real friends and I know this. I think I’m going to change all my contact info so none of these people can find me. My close friends would never dare ask such favors. And those are the guys you DO hook up when you can.

Maybe I need a good Tranny to surprise them. Yea bro, I have a hot porno girl for you. She sucks a mean cock, bro.

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Fuck Bird Flu

18 October 2005 by dwb

There. I said it.

I’m so sick and tired of getting fear pumped into us 24/7 by the media and the powers that be, often one of the same. Bird flu, be alert at the airports, be alert on the trains, watch out of carbon monoxide gas, AIDS, terrorist want to kill us, there are stolen nuclear weapons, Anthrax, chemical warfare, Muslim extremists, and I’m sure I am missing out on 50 others but you get the point. It’s like we’re all living at DEFCON 2.

People are supposed to die. Shit happens. A plague happens every 100 years or so and we are overdue. Lets lighten up and a bit and let the cards fall where they may. It’s a fact that you and I are going to die so lets accept this fact and enjoy what life we have instead of worrying sick about everything that is fed into our little sheep minds. I refuse to live in fear of this garbage because it is totally out of our control. Don’t fear bird flu, fear 25 Colombian military police kicking your door in accusing you of making child porn. That is fear.

As I write this bird flu BS post I’m gearing up for Thailand and of course, they are having bird flu problems. Last year it was SARS, which by the way I was quarantined for when I got back to the USA. That is a funny story within itself and will tell you about it later. Before SARS, Thailand had AIDS. I’m sure something is already in the works for when we are no longer afraid of SARS. Something new will emerge and scare us all to death. It will be a pandemic and probably global. You will be afraid to leave your house and the stock market will fall because of it, while the pharmaceutical companies who create the vaccine will see record profits. It’s all become so predictable. Yawn.

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Stretch Marks

13 October 2005 by dwb

Which way to Vegas? In my down time the past week I’ve been meeting some new potential models. I’m trying to shoot a handful of black girls before I leave for Thailand and as of right now, I’m failing miserably.

Usually it’s 50/50 in regards to the quality of the girls. So far I am at 100% skank. I’d like to meet the person responsible for encouraging these girls to strip, model or sell their ass. They need to be back handed. Not a single girl had a smooth stomach. Even though all of them told me on the phone they were in great shape with no marks, these hoes had stretched out bellies that looked like a road map.

This leads me to my next question. Why do the majority of inner city girls have stomachs like this? Doesn’t anyone teach them how to take care of their bodies when they are pregnant? Are they that ignorant? I’m not just talking about a few marks, I’m talking about a stomach that looks like an alien ripped out of it and attacked the entire family. A true train wreck.

Mothers, for the love of god… please teach your daughters about coco butter.

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Biometric ATMs

09 October 2005 by dwb

No, I’m not talking about Ass To Mouth, I mean real ATM money machines. Get your head out of the shitter already.

I actually had the chance to see some of these being used down in Colombia where they are trying this new technology. Very cool stuff. You stick your thumb down on a pad and it reads your print. As long as it’s YOU, you get cash.

The only problem I see is people getting robbed or killed and forced to go to the ATM or even worse, have their dead body taken to the ATM. Anyone think of a solution for that yet because… well… it is Colombia.

There was a linked story here but Yahoo moved it and the link is broken. I’m not sure what good a site is like Yahoo if all their old links are broken.

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Dumb Bitches Gone Wild

07 October 2005 by dwb

I’m watching TV tonight desperately trying to find ANYTHING worth watching on the 400+ channels I have, when I stop to watch one of the newer Girls Gone Wild commercials. What is up with these whores?

This time they are one some island but they are also searching for new girls to be on the island and compete for something. Not sure what, but it looks degrading. Yea, I know, pot meet kettle, but these are not dirty hookers. They are also in the clubs having girls do push ups on the floor and comment that she is doing the push ups in vomit before showing her tits. I’ve done a lot of bad things to girls, but never anything like that. Yuk. Have a little pride for fucks sake. Everyone fucks, but who does push-ups in other peoples vomit?

That’s when it hit me.

These are the stupidest, desperate for attention whores I have ever seen. The dumb fucking sluts are showing their tits, doing push ups in vomit and making complete asses of themselves. At least porn chicks get PAID for sucking dicks and taking loads in the ass. That is respectable. You can respect hookers and strippers because they are making good money doing what it is they do. But these ignorant drunk sluts are just showing it off for what? A t-shirt? Maybe a few bucks but God damn… everyone including their father is going to see this shit late night on TV. “Is that my baby girl doing push ups in vomit?”

The guy who made this is a genius (and a rapist/asshole/tax evader apparently) but the drunk whores they get to flash the tits need to have a foot put in their ass. If any girlfriend of mine ever came home from a club to tell me she flashed her tits (for free) to some camera crew, I would kick her out of the house immediately and burn her belongings in the street. If you know one of these dumb whores who have flashed their tits for free or have done push ups in vomit, please do the same. They may not be “dirty whores” but they are the dumbest whores I’ve ever seen.

Leave a comment | Categories: Thinking Out Loud, What The Fuck, Whores | Tags: , , ,

Black girls in the ghetto

04 October 2005 by dwb

It’s been a while since I’ve shot girls in the USA. Most of the time I only work with black models when I’m here because, well, because:

1) They usually work cheap and everyone knows how I love to exploit the black youth of America.

2) I am addicted to those round & brown bubble butts. I think black women are the most beautiful women on earth, but that doesn’t mean I won’t get one over them when it comes to making a profit in this business.

I’m in the country for a month or two and decided to shoot some new girls while I’m in. I’ll post pics of girls as I meet them (if I actually get off my ass to shoot any) but prepare yourself for a laugh. Whenever word is out that I’m hunting new models, the roaches come out of the cracks. If I put the word out, you’re gonna see some serious crack head skanks!!! Hopefully after about 20 broke down, beat up, street walking hookers, I’ll find 4 or 5 stallions that will make the cut.

In the end though, they are all the same. They will come to me dead broke, get paid anywhere from $200 – $500 and within 48 hours they will call me wanting to do another scene because they are broke. I will ask, “what did you do with your money?” and they will reply with something like, “I bought a lot of shoes.” This is why the people in the ghetto stay in the ghetto. They have no concept of a dollar or what to do with it. This doesn’t just apply to people in the hood though, this way of life is a global issue and you’ll find it anywhere you find poverty.

Somewhere during their 8 – 12 years in school, there needs to be a class that teaches children of all color how to responsibly handle money. These kids get out of school and just lose their mind when they get paid. I have a pimp friend who never gives his bitches all their money. I asked him why once and he told me that if he did, the bitches would kill themselves trying to spend the money on drugs or whatever. He said if he gave one of his bitches $500, she would be dead in 2 days. He himself went on to build a small empire only to have it all swept out from under him and locked up for 2 years (and some change) for various charges related to prostitution and promoting prostitution. Damn shame.

I guess you really can’t teach a Sneetch.

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