Sometimes I make porn and stuff. Sometimes I just ramble.
John called me today to proudly confess that he just saw his penis for the first time in years. He was giggling like a little schoolboy.
I threw up in my mouth a little.
And for a brief moment, the world stood still.
Jenny is John’s right hand she-man, weekend lover, fill in stunt cock and muse.
John has re-named her “Jenny Star” after the popular ladyboy bar, Jenny Star Bar, on Walking Street here in Pattaya.
Jenny often makes dumb faces, makes dumb noises and will not hesitate to jump on your shoulders and dry hump you in the middle of a restaurant. Yes, really. Sometimes she is fun, but when you’re not in the mood, she will jump up and down on your very last nerve and grunt like an ape while doing it.
Right now, she is really getting on my nerves.
A friend of mine who has a ladyboy girlfriend (already sounds like a bad start), would come to Pattaya from Bangkok and shoot with us. On the side he would get a BJ or two while his other half would watch TV in Bangkok, or would be out giving a BJ or two.
When he came to town, Jenny was the first to run her mouth that he had been playing around with other ladyboys. And for those who don’t know, there is a thing called The Ladyboy Network. Think of it like the “red phone” that world leaders may have to call each other moments before a nuclear war. An emergency hot line.
Well, ladyboys have a similar system and word travels among them faster than you could ever imagine.
Jenny has been using The Ladyboy Network to let everyone know, all the way in Bangkok two hours away, that this guy is being a butterfly. This is problem number one.
Problem number two is, as I’m searching for ladyboys to shoot myself, I’m running across many ladyboys who will tell me that I have to ask Jenny or Mister John if they can work with me.
This is a first.
The doings of Jenny and/or Mr. Johns I don’t know, but it is quite comical to watch a dead broke yaa-baa freak stay broke because another ladyboy would tell her to do so. However, this is Thailand and anything is possible.
Do you remember the girl who robbed me?
Well, Jenny could not keep her mouth shut about that as well. We all know Jenny can’t read English so one can only assume her boyfriend read it to her off my blog.
I rolled into a ladyboy bar tonight and had to give a play by play to 6 or 7 different ladyboys who wanted to know the entire story. I asked them how they knew, they all said Jenny. What a cunt! Or maybe she is a dick. I’m not sure what to call her, but she is on very thin ice.
Jenny is making about $500 USD per week working for John, bring him talent and such. To her, she has hit the jackpot, but I’m not sure what she is doing with her cash. My guess is she will send most of it home to her parents who probably pimped her out in the first place. However, John will be gone soon and she will still be a 3rd world transsexual prostitute. And I’m looking forward to it.
In the event she is smart enough to save her money or do something positive with it, she will still be broke in a matter of weeks, maybe even days after he is gone. That is the Thai way.
Today I started shooting some make-up scenes for a gay movie I made and 2 of the scenes did not turn out as wanted. I was supposed to shoot with Allan, one of the Brazilian boys, but he was unable to shoot and I had no choice but to use another Thai boy.
My Thai assistant went out and found a top and a bottom. Both were good looking boys, one of them so gay he left a trail of rainbow flames behind him as he walked around the room. “Intergalactic uber gay” are the words I am looking for.
I shot the solo photos and started into the scene where I was planning to shoot the BJ footage, then stop and do the BJ photos, then move on. Being that they were inexperienced, I would have to walk them through this step by step. Not a problem, I’m used to working this way.
The first boy sucks the hell out of the other boys cock, and when it comes time to switch the other boy says, “can not do, I not gay.”
WHAT THE FUCK!!??!!??
So this freaking little boy refuses to suck the other boys cock because all of a sudden he is not gay.Besides the fact that he works at a gay bar. Besides the fact he is a gay prostitute. Besides the fact he said he was gay. Besides the fact he was just letting another boy blow him on video… he is now saying he is not gay.
Then it hits me. Even the gay boys pull this stunt!
The girls do it all the time. So do some of the ladyboys. The lazy whores will tell you anything you want to hear until they get to the room and then they say they can’t do this or that, after they told you they already can. Tell you they will do anal and then when it comes time to stick it in their ass say they don’t do anal and can’t do anal. The trick is for them to bullshit you into paying their bar fine, getting them out of the bar, and paying them for doing less work. Or even better, no work at all.
Some of them then want you to pay them full price so they can leave without having to work. This is very common these days and a damn good whore trick. I mean really… what are you going to do, call the police on them? And they know this. The boys are no exception to this rule it appears.
So I lose my cool on this scamming little fuck and tell him at least he has to jerk him off and fuck him. I let him slide on the cock sucking, because while that is gay to him, the other acts are not.
He jacks him off a little but neither of the boys have any wood at all.
Fuck.
The scene just went to total shit. I want to murder them both.
I’m not one to give up on a scene, so we tough it out until there is a little wood and we can somewhat finish this sorry excuse for a scene. The “straight boy” was finally able to cum, and the other boy, the intergalactic uber gay boy, beat his limp dick for an hour and could not cum. I called it a wrap.
As they were getting dressed, the intergalactic uber gay boy admits to being awake for 3 days on drugs.
Then the phone rings, it is John T Bone.
John: I just had the worst shoot.
Me: What happened?
John: It was 6 people, 2 girls and 4 boys… bi sex.
Me: And…
John: We spent all day shooting photos and 30 minutes into the scene when it came time for the boys to start fucking, they told me they couldn’t do it because they were not gay.
Me: The exact thing happened to me today! Wow. Maybe they called each other this morning and planned it out. Boyztown is out to get us I have heard.
John: They wasted my entire day. This was a big event, lots of planning. They all said they were gay! Fucking liars, all of them.
Me: What’s the cat think about this?
John: The cat is gone. Jenny ate him for real this time.
Me: So your boys were not gay AND Jenny ate the cat for real?
John: Yup, I think so. He had such a bright future ahead of him.
Me: Fuck. Your day was worse than mine. I need a blow job and a massage, wanna go get a Soapy?
John: Can’t, I have four more boys coming over now to finish the scene. I may throw one off my balcony just to prove a point.
Me: And what point would that be?
John: That they had better suck cocks when I say to start sucking cocks.
Me: Best of luck with that one, sorry about the cat. I hope twinks can fly, I hear some of them can.
(I really read that somewhere)
That was the last I heard of him… 8 hours ago. We both had been fooled by the Boyztown Punk’d Posse.
Hell is… shooting gay porn with boys who are not gay.
I’m not sure what is going on over John T Bone’s place but his cat is looking rough.
Maybe he has cat AIDS or something.
Down to his last life.
Strung out on catnip and abused by ladyboys.
Dying of feline cancer.
Hasn’t slept for days.
Ran out of money to finish his kitty porn movies and is stressing out.
What ever it is… I don’t want to get any on me.
I got a phone call this morning from John T Bone asking me in a serious voice to build a blog for his cat.
HIS FUCKING STRAY CAT!!!!
I hung up on him.
“Tiddles” is his name and John has apparently been teaching him how to shoot and direct.
Not that it’s a hard job, but word has it the cat is hot shit with a serious attitude.
The cat has left Johns apartment twice and ended up down the street at my door. I hate cats and never take him inside my place when he shows up, but I’m thinking he followed the sent of the Brazilian boys to my place. Or maybe he is just wanted to sneak onto my set and get some pussy in the bathroom. Anything is possible
Hmmm. Maybe I should build him a blog. The industry is full ass hats, why not add a porno cat to the mix? Couldn’t hurt.
I’m losing my mind.